Well, I've been doing much better mentally. My body's still rather crappy. I can't seem to do anything without getting a cramp or an ache. It's all this rain (though I can't stop the rain, so I just try to enjoy it.) I stayed up past nine in the morning trying to call a psychologist's office and then a psychiatrist's office. The psychologist's office is only open Mondays-Thursdays from 2:00-6:00 p.m. (I believe)... so that didn't work out. The other number I had that was for the psychiatrist was the wrong number (went to a neurosurgery office), but they redirected me. However, when I called and asked about the doctor, the operator said, "He doesn't work her anymore," with a snarky attitude. I asked if she could give me his contact information and she replied in the same tone, "We don't have it; he doesn't work here anymore," and then right as I was going to say, "Thanks anyway," she hung up on me! I just wish I could get her fired... unless there was actually a good reason for it. It was almost as if she hated his guts, whoever this illusive doctor is. None of this helped with my phone anxieties, for sure. If anything, they made them worse.
I ended up staying up until around noontime and started dozing off... in a rather strange position on the couch... My back was hurting and there weren't many positions I could lie down or sit in. I woke up periodically until finally fully getting up around 7:00 p.m. I kind of feel like laying lazily about and doing nothing... Oh, wait, I'm already doing that. Mission accomplished. I already went for a walk in the morning so I'm not going to bother going back into the rain for another walk, even if I generally enjoy walking in the rain. My legs can only take so much anymore.
A friend online posted a quote that hit home with me: "Sometimes, I push you away because I need you to pull me closer."
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